This is a topic that is very dear to my heart. When I found out I was pregnant with my daughter – I was overjoyed! I was also very unsure how to prepare my son to be a big brother. Through reading, thinking, and digging deep – I came up with the following things that were particularly helpful.

1. Remember – you have enough love to go around – so don’t panic! Personally, I felt like my son (first born) stole my heart when he made me a mommy. I wasn’t sure how I could ever love another as much as him. When his sister was born, my heart instantly doubled in size! I love them both equally – with my whole heart. I have no idea how it’s possible, but it is. So don’t worry, you will have enough love to go around 🙂
2. Kids are smart, so it is a great idea to prepare them to welcome a sibling. I’ve heard other parents say that their kids are too young to prepare them – and I disagree. I think we underestimate kids – they are capable of so much more than we think! That being said – don’t shy away from preparing them the best you can.
3. Books are a great way to introduce the idea of a new baby to little ones. A couple of my favorites include: There’s a Baby in There! – Big Brothers Are the Best! (there’s a version for big sisters as well) – Big Brother Daniel – and What Baby Needs. It’s good to get a couple so that you can mix it up a bit. You also don’t always know which book they will like or connect to best. Books help put your thoughts into words, and the images help your little one to better understand what’s going on. It’s also a great way to bond with your little one in the final moments before they are no longer an only child.
4. A stroller and baby doll can help teach your kiddo how to be gentle with baby. We purchased a small stroller for our son and a soft babydoll so he could practice being a big brother. He loved it! He would push the stroller around the living room and give baby lots of hugs. We would put baby on the couch and practice how to be gentle, where he was allowed to touch baby (on the feet vs. on the face), and how to whisper when baby was sleeping. I also changed baby dolls diaper and had him help me. Our doll came with a diaper and I used kleenex for wipes and kept our powder closed when pretending to change diapers. His job was to hand me the “wipes,” powder, and clean diaper. He loved it because it made him feel big and important! We got him a soft doll that had a magnetic pacifier and he loved it!
5. Get your kiddo involved in the process. Your child can pick out a new outfit for baby, a special toy for the nursery, etc. It’s also really fun to include them in the gender reveal if you plan on doing one. A family baby bump photo session is another way to get them involved. I had Gabe put pink paint on his hands and touch my belly. We took photos to show that we were having a girl. Getting your kiddo involved in the process shows that they are not being left behind – and that they are part of this big new event!
6. Pick out gifts for the hospital. My belly was getting big and we had been telling Gabe he was going to meet his baby sister soon. He would hug me and say hi to sister in my tummy – which was super cute! Kiddos get along pretty well when baby is still in your belly vs. your newborn joins you! lol! To help make the hospital introduction extra special, and give your older child something to connect to, think about a gift exchange. I took our son to the toy store and had him pick out a special gift to give his baby sister at the hospital. He wasn’t even 2 but he still understood picking out a present for baby. On the flip side, I also watched him look around and what toys he got excited about for himself. I went back to the toy store without him and got a special gift to give Gabe from the baby. He was SO excited to get something from his sister – and it helped them bond a bit.
7. Think about how to keep your older child occupied while you are feeding baby. Newborns eat every couple of hours – so you’re going to be busy! That can be really hard on your first born. Pick out something special that you only pull out for feeding times. Once feeding time is over – the toy gets put away. That makes it special for both kids. This works for breastfeeding or bottle feeding – and acts as a happy distraction – so they don’t feel left out. As an example, I got our son some little fire engine toys and a couple of board books. They were kept in a little basket and we pulled it out when I was alone with both kids and wanted to keep him busy while I fed his sister. Instead of feeling left out – he felt like a big kid who got to play with something special that his sister was too little to play with. 🙂 NOTE: Do not pick noisy toys! Feeding time is supposed to be relaxing and for the most part quiet for baby – so pick toys your older kiddo will have fun with but aren’t going to make a ton of noise and chaos! lol! They do make trucks, trains, robots, legos, dolls, puppets, and other toys that are fun and don’t make noise! 😉
8. Revisit your favorite baby books for quick reminders on what worked well the first time around. My favorite books for both pregnancies are On Becoming Baby Wise and The Happiest Baby On the Block. I read them both cover to cover as a way to prepare and, the second time around, as a way to refresh myself for a newborn. It’s amazing how fast you get out of newborn mode. Children grow and change quickly, and we grow with them. It made me feel more calm and prepared by revisiting my two favorite books. One other tip is to highlight your favorites parts for your partner. That made it much easier for my husband to quickly revisit the refresh himself on the most helpful parts of both books.
9. Pull together newborn items from when your firstborn was little. Even though I had a boy first, I had a lot of gender neutral little pants, socks, onesies and swaddles that worked perfectly for my daughter. It saved us a lot of money, and it was special to see our daughter in some of our favorite little things from when our son was tiny. 🙂
10. Start to introduce your little one to baby equipment. I pulled out the baby swing and bassinet in the third trimester so that our son could get used to them around the house. I also wanted him to ask questions, learn who they belonged to (his new baby sister) and see where the baby was going to spend a lot of time. It’s a nice intro to how your home will change for your kiddo – and it helps to do it before baby arrives.
11. Find a sitter, family member or friend that you trust and make sure they are 100% prepared to jump in as you get close to your due date. When I was pregnant with Sofia, I had prepared a document with emergency contact info, schedules, medicine doses (Tylenol etc.), favorite toys, feeding times, nap times, etc. I also included all the details for feedings, walks, and vet info for our dogs. Don’t forget to plan ahead for the whole family. It’ll make you feel more prepared – and will allow you to relax more at the hospital. Send a copy of the document to the folks who may be caring for your kiddo and pets while you are in the hospital. Don’t forget to print one or two copies out for the house as well. Put a copy on the fridge so it’s front and center.
12. Prepare meals and freeze them! Having a second child is amazing – and in a way – easier than baby #1. I was more relaxed the second time around – having already been through the basics with Gabe. That being said, it was still super busy! When Sofia was born, Gabe hadn’t even turned 2 yet. He was still a baby himself, and he wanted mommy! By preparing meals and freezing them – it makes it a bit easier when you get home from the hospital and everyone is hungry. It will help free up a little more time so you can snuggle up with your older kiddo and have some special time. You can also make some of your kiddos favorite meals in advance – which can be comforting to them. Remember – the little things matter a lot to kids.
13. Discuss your routine with your partner. Every family does things in the their own way. When I was pregnant with Sofia, I would get Gabe out of bed each morning. After I had Sofia, it was usually time to breastfeed in the early morning, so daddy got Gabe out of bed. That simple change in his schedule was hard for him. We adjusted and I made it a point to get him out of bed still. The small things that our kids count on as part of their routine can make a BIG difference. Think about what is part of your kiddos routine and what you can continue to do even after baby arrives. Look at how you can keep certain things consistent for them. A new baby is a HUGE change for them as well – and by keeping a handful of little things in their routine consistent – it’ll give them a sense of security that they are still important to you.
14. Pack your hospital bag and write your birth plan! Check out my other posts for details!
15. Take some time for YOU! Making a baby is a lot of work – especially when you have another kiddo that you’re chasing around! lol! Schedule a prenatal massage, go out to eat with a friend, meditate, get a mani/pedi…just try to take a little time for yourself. Making time to destress is really good for mommy AND baby!

Hope this helps! Congrats again! xoxo